American Idol: 4 Becomes 3, and the Wrong Person Goes Home

Sorry this is late. Blogger was down for some reason. Lame. But here I am! Ready to rock and roll!

My Bottom Two:
Lauren - X
Scotty

Mom's Bottom Two:
Lauren - X
James (what the eff, mom? She doesn't want him to be, but she's nervous)

Dad's Bottom Two:
Haley - X
Lauren

So, guess whose favorite author likes American Idol? Mine. Tonight, Sarah Dessen mentioned American Idol about 3 times. I love her even more now! (I'll post a blog about my experience tomorrow.)

Here was a conversation between me and my parents:
Me: "They keep trying to play up Haley's legs, you notice that?"
Dad: "Yeah, well they can't do that with Lauren."
Mom: Gives him a look.
Dad: "What? They can't. She's always wearing boots and stuff."
Hahaha oh, Dad.

So, Scotty and James' song kind of sucks. Scotty annoys the crap out of me. If he keeps up this weirdness, hopefully he'll leave. Scotty has no natural stage presence, it all feels forced (that weird swatting at the camera? Stop that). James did as decent as he could, but his guitar was radical.

Haley and Lauren are singing Miranda Lambert's "Gun Powder and Lead." What is up with all these country songs tonight? Seriously. James and Haley don't sing country. This really isn't great. I mean, it's okay, I guess. But nothing exciting.
My dad liked it (he's loco).

Family montage (nice plug for Windows):
Lauren's dogs were ugly. Her brother looks like Justin Beiber.
Holy crapole James' son is way too cute. I love him (can I offer to babysit?)
Scotty hasn't seen his sister in a dern month. Yee-haw.
Haley's conversation was clearly boring, because they didn't show much of her.

First person in the Top 3:
Lauren Alaina.
Dammit. Her sister/mom seems excited, but me? Not so much. If James goes home, someone is gonna experience my wrath.

Here's the Idols watching Gaga. Scotty is praying for her soul, Haley is remembering when she sang "You and I" and feeling jealous, Lauren Alaina is thinking about her sister/mom (I just need another reference), James is admiring her craziness and artistry. By the way, I love Lady Gaga's piano. It is frickin rad.

We skipped through Enrique Igleasias (is that spelled right?), because we don't really care. And I have stuff to do.

Ford Music Video. They're singing "Fireflies"? This is seriously happening? Awesome job, Idol staff. That was terrible.

Jordin Sparks - fast forwarded through. Sorry, people of the blogosphere. But I just don't think I can ever listen to a Jordin Sparks song again without having Jacob Lusk gyrating for Jesus up there. It will never be the same (I just really loved Jacob)!!

Why is Steven Tyler hugging a sloth in his music video? That was weird, even for him. And a vulture? An elephant? Everything is melting? What is happening?!
But hey, this was actually pretty good. And I'm also pretty positive American Idol has officially lost its Family Show rating with that video. Most adults will small children will flip (understandably, I guess).

Haley is in the Top 3, too?
Holy crap, my mom is about to poop her pants. If James goes home, my mom will react the same way I did when P McD went home.
Scotty better be going home. Or else I'm organizing a boycott of American Idol!
Here we go, America......SCOTTY EFFING FLUTE EXTRAORDINAIRE McCREERY is going to the finals? Is this a joke or something? Because, uh, ya know, James deserved to win this whole show. Seriously.
Wow, America. You guys messed up big time. I may never forgive you! Guess who's responsible? Yeah, I'm looking at you tween girls (I hate you). You girls shouldn't have the right to vote. Scotty McCreery doesn't deserve to be here, sorry buddy.
This is ridiculous, America. I wish the judges could replace one of the others with James.

Yeah, I'm devastated too, James.

Yargh. What a terrible ending to a great day. I guess I'm boycotting American Idol now. Sorry, guys (actually, this probably won't really happen). But this season has just delivered too much heartbreak and disappointment for me to handle. First Paul McDonald, then James Durbin. Twitch, may you have a better career than the rest of the lame-o's in the Top Three.
And with that, good night.

Guess Who I Get to Meet Tonight?

I'll give you three guesses... But since you'll most likely guess wrong all three times (and if you're thinking it's Paul McDonald, it's not, unfortunately), I'll give you a hint.
Here's a picture of her, I'm sure you'll know now.

You know now, right? No? It's Sarah Dessen! Yipee. So, who is this lovely lady? She is an excellent author (whom I love) who writes amazing books. I've read all of her books, and a new one was just released (picture below), so Mrs. Dessen is promoting her book by visiting a bunch of bookstores. And she is coming to my local Tattered Cover tonight at 7, and I'm thrilled beyond words. Here's the cover of her new book, "What Happened to Goodbye":

Ooh I'm so excited! The main character is named McClean (mc-clayn). Sarah Dessen chooses the best names for her characters (I think I may do a post about that tomorrow).

So, you're probably wondering, "Why are you so excited to meet Sarah Dessen?" Well, let me answer your pressing question.
Not only do I adore Sarah Dessen's books and characters, she also knows how to relate to her readers. It's really great because the characters tend to have issues that readers can relate to, and if they can't, they're still enveloped in the story line (I can rarely put her books down). I've even read my absolute favorite of her books, "This Lullaby," about 7 times. Great book. Dessen has a very distinct style, which I love.
To add to that wonderfulness, Dessen's books and writing have inspired me to write. I am serious. I've always enjoyed reading, as well as writing, but Dessen's books truly inspired me to begin writing a book. I've started and stopped a few for awhile, but I finally started one I really like and I think it'll be good (unfortunately, it's so hard to write with school in the way! Summer is coming though, so I'll write a lot).

As you can see, Sarah Dessen is frickin' awesome. I am so pumped to meet her. I may or may not post pictures later!
By the way, check out her books. You won't regret it. You'll fall in love with her and her characters.

American Idol Top 4: Gaga and Old Guys

Alrighty, Americans. It's time for our country's favorite show of Idols - American Idol.
Before we get started, I have some shameless bragging to do. My mother and I are semi-road tripping it to Portland Oregon this July to see...*drumroll please* the American Idol LIVE! Tour (see that emphasis)! And my mom got online at the exact minute that the pre-sale tickets went on sale, and bought us Row NINE seats! She's awesome (I was taking an AP exam, so she took the responsibility of ticket buyer). So, if anyone is going to the Portland American Idol concert, look for the girl in a glitzed out Grand Magnolias t-shirt, (possibly) stalking Paul McDonald.

I really love how they compared the Idols to heroes. That's a pretty bold statement, American Idol people.

First up are songs that inspire the contestants.

Opening the show is my favorite, James Durbin
He'll be tackling "Don't Stop Believing." Firstly, why did Twitch bleach part of his hair? I disapprove. Onto the singing, this performance was muy excelente. James' voice sounded awesome (he toned down his high notes), and this song really worked for him. As my dad said, James performs like he's in a band, whereas the other performers don't.
The judges love Twitch, and so does my family. This man is in it to win it, and I cannot wait to see him win. Gotta love this guy! I just can't properly insult/critique James.
I forgot to mention that James always has fun up there. Rock on, dude.

Haley Reinhart

These pants are super tight.

She's singing "The Earth Song." This may be absolutely terrible, but when Ryan Seacrest said she's tackling the King of Pop, my mind went to Justin Beiber. I'm embarrassed! Please forgive me.
I think this song is great, and I remember the clip of this song from the Michael Jackson Concert movie. And, quite frankly, I'm not so sure Haley is doing it justice. I adore Haley for some reason, her scratchy voice appeals to me a lot, but I'm cautious. The beginning was slightly boring, but then she kicked it into gear! Nice job, girl, you ended on a great note. Literally (that last note was really strong).
I will paraphrase what JLo said, at this point in the competition, this may or may not have been the best song choice. She did a good job, but she really could have chosen a better song.
Unfortunately, it seems this poor girl can never win (with the judges or the show).

Scotty da Body, Flute Extraordinaire
Dear Scotty, if you don't hold your microphone like a flute tonight, I will not vote for you (I never have, but still).
He's singing "Mumble Mumble World Stop Turning." It's gonna be a mellow hoedown.
My parents and I always seem to be shocked when Scotty opens his mouth and sings so deep. Seriously.
Hold the phone, America. Is this song written from the point of view of George W. Bush? One line is, "I'm not sure I could tell you the difference between Iraq and Iran, but I know Jesus and I talk to God." Holy crapole, I literally just laughed my butt off. Guess who just lost my vote, times two? Why would he choose this song? He kind of just sounds stupid, singing those lyrics. I should clarify that Scotty's voice is excellent, I just think that song was hilarious (now we know he's a Bible-loving, Republican).
Oh, and my dad thinks that Scotty is full of crap with his explanation of the song choice.

Guess who I just saw?? My Future Fiance, with his filler girlfriend, Nikki Reed (stop flaunting it! I get it, okay!). They were behind Randy at the end of the song. I can spot Paul McDonald from a fast glimpse. I can't wait to meet this man... I miss him. Let's look at a picture of this lovely person.

I can wear bandannas around my neck. I'm that cool.

There Paul is with Casey!!! Oh, how I love him! Paul, guess what? I already got tickets to see you, and you alone (and I guess the other Idols...).

Lauren Alaina

So she chose "Do it Anyway" by Martina McBride song, to let people know it's okay to rebuild their lives, and to have faith. Awesome, I LOVE when singers preach to me.
Her dress is horrid. I saw this in a prom magazine, and laughed.
So listen, dog (I'm channeling my inner Randy), Lauren's voice is awesome. She has a great range and can hit great notes, and I can definitely see the emotion in this song. It was a beautiful performance, BUT...that last note could have and should have been much bigger. I'm a little disappointed that she held back there, but still good. My dad and I just replayed that and sang over the end with a bigger, stronger note. Glass may or may not have broken.
Randy says, "You know what was wrong with that song?" Trick question, America! "Nothing!" Oh Randy, you jokester.

Leiber and Stoller songs are up next. Is anyone else wondering, "Who the eff are those people?" Because I am. But I do know who Gaga is.

Lady Gaga montage. She gets crazier and crazier. But beautiful, right (no)? I love the drawn on mole, the things jutting out of her cheeks, and her black bangs, and 10 inch heels. Wow. I have a new style icon.

Haley Reinhart
Guess who's doing another slower song? Haley. She's singing "I Who Have Nothing." Lady Gaga tells her to make her performance "a laugh away from a tear." Awesome.
I love orchestras in songs, and I was instantly drawn to this song. Haley's voice sounded amazing at the beginning of the song, she really can add drama to the already dramatic orchestra. She sounds much, much better than the first song. Okay, the ending was phenomenal. Her anger totally inspired the passion in her voice. The last "I love you" gave me goosebumps (that is a sign of awesomeness). I loved this, the judges loved it, and we all gave her a standing ovation (even my darling P McD).
Nice job, Haley! You have filled me with pride.

Scotty da Body, Flute and Jesus Talking Extraordinaire (like the new addition to his nickname? But it could be a curse for him, as we've seen with my past nicknames.)

I love Jesus and holding a microphone like a flute.

My mom thinks that Gaga is going to tell McCreery to wear her heels. I think she is going to encourage more drug use, or possibly holding the microphone like a flute (she better!).
He's singing "Young Blood." Gaga encouraged him to make out with the microphone. Awesome. She totally corrupted Scotty's conservative morals.
Wow that was a terrible performance. I can't help but wonder what drug he took, but my mom says he's just high on Jesus. That was horrendous, and terribly hokey. Seriously. And what's up with his crazy eyebrow movement (they looked like they would jump off of his head, like in cartoons)? Wow, Scotty, that was just bad.
The only plus? He returned to his fluting ways.

Lauren Alaina
Wow that's a sparkly jacket. Hand me my sunglasses, Chauncey! (That's the name of my imaginary butler.)
She is singing "Trouble," by Elvis Presley. Lady Gaga was weird at 16?? And Lauren doesn't want to call herself evil?? One of these things is ridiculous, and that is the latter. Lauren needs to loosen up, and stop sharing clothes with her sister/mom.
First of all, that dress is way too tight (sorry, girly), and she has way too much hair. Also, her dancing and attempted theatrics are so awkward.
My dad said this song was evil (he said this accidentally), and I agree. It wasn't great, and it seemed a little forced. The beginning was decent, but then it got weird and awkward. I don't know, it didn't work.
She might go home.
Also, mis padres and I can't help but wonder why she picked this song if she was all concerned about the whole evil thing. That was all she sang. I disagree with the judges, I thought it was not good.

Twitch

"Love Potion No. 9," is James' choice. He shall do excellent, I say! Gaga, in her leotard and bizarre wig, started dancing with Durbie. Yeah, he can be theatrical! Rock it out, my main man (second to Paul).
A rock feel to this song? I can dig it. Wow Twitch is awesome. I love his rock songs, and his upper register is so awesome. Not only is James' voice amazing, his performances are also amazing. I pretty much wait for his performance every week, starting on Wednesday at 8:35. Also, I love his theatrics and interaction with the band. He has so much fun up there, and he totally rocked that song.
I cannot wait to see him go all the way (and win)!! Huzzah.

So, best of the night? James.
Worst? Eh, probably Lauren.
My father and I agree that we want the Top 2 to be Twitch and Haley (although it will be probably Scotty instead of Haley).

Good night of performances. I can dig it. That's all, America! Tune in tomorrow for the results.

The Voice: The Singers Duke it Out Vocally - Part 1.5

Aaand she's back. It's time for Part 1.5 of my recap of The Voice.
In the first half, Frenchie Davis made it from Christina Aguliera's team, and Patrick Thomas made it from Blake Shelton's team. Let's see who moves on and who is defeated in the second half.

Next up is Adam Levine's team. This man is gorgeous. Take a look.

Eye candy? Yes, indeed.

Casey Weston vs. Tim Mahoney
They will sing "Leather and Lace." Umm... Casey has an annoyingly high voice, I cannot listen to her talk.
Adam Blackstone, who helps out in Maroon 5, is aiding these hopeful talents (?) in singing together. Let me be honest, I'm not a huge fan of the voices on this show, but I do like how the judges/coaches help out their team. The more of Adam Levine, the better.
Onto the actual performance. Whoa, they made Casey look like a slut. Her dad was afraid to say it, but I'm not.
Singing critique: Casey's voice is interesting, but I'm not sure how much I like it. It's shaky, but in a nervous way, and I think she could use some finetuning. Tim's voice is much better. He has a certain rasp and uniqueness to his voice, but he makes weird faces when he sings (like he's in pain). I could care less about which one goes home, but I like Tim slightly better than Casey, so I'd pick him to win. So Cee Lo said that Casey sounds like Stevie Nicks, and then mumbled some nonsense (he needs captions on this show).
Winner: Casey Weston. So...clearly I cannot pick winners. Casey just annoys me, though, but here she is.

Next up are singers from Cee Lo's team. Why does he wear all red? It hurts my eyes.
Here's an image of that:

 He's a big boy, with a big voice. Hey, news alert (well, maybe not to some more informed readers):
 Cee Lo used to sing in Gnarls Barkley. Mind blown.


So, we got Vicci Martinez vs. Niki Dawson. Vicci and Niki! Yeah.
"Perfect" by Pink is the song they will sing. I love this song, so hopefully they do it justice.
I like Vicci's voice better than Niki voice. It has a lot of soul and it's unique, which I clearly enjoy. Niki on the other hand sounds a little too pop for me. During rehearsal, Cee Lo loves it. He waddled around the stage in his head-to-toe red outfit, seemingly conflicted.
Into the ring they go! First of all, Niki's hair is ridiculous (did she forget to take out the curler?), and an animal is trying to escape from her pants. These things may pose a problem. Vicci's voice sounds awesome in this song, her uniqueness isn't forced, like some of the other contestants. Niki is good, too, but I'm not as big of a fan. But, let's face it, they kind of sound very similar. This performance was pretty decent. I choose Vicci as a winner.
Adam Levine loved that duet, as did I. Blake Shelton said that they're both pretty awesome. Christina Aguliera sang.
Winner: Vicci Martinez.
Awesome, I was right this time! Let's take a look at the winner.

I really like this picture. And, hey, guess what? Vicci appeared on American Idol before The Voice. I think we can ascertain which show is better...

And with that, I am off to prepare myself for American Idol. See you lovely people tonight!

Guess Who's Visiting on May 21st?

Holy crap! Mark your calendars!! Because on May 21st the rapture is going to happen!! Wait...what?

Let's just get this straight. Apparently, on May 21st, Jesus H. Christ is returning to Earth (probably just America, though, of course). And, according to www.wecanknow.com, the  Good Book points to Jesus coming back next weekend! Let's take a gander, shall we? First, here's the Big Man himself:

That's how I'd want to picture him. I also can't help but wonder how Jacob "I Gyrate for Jesus" Lusk would react to this visit...

Anywhoo, let's check the Bible. According to 1 Thessalonians 5:2, "For yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so cometh as a thief in the night." Oh, I see now.
Then, aforementioned website discusses how God told Noah when he was going to flood the world, and how He told Lot when he was going to blow up Sodom, the city of angel rapers (seriously).
After that goobly-guck, the website ends the explanation with, and I quote, "We can know something about how God will behave in the future by looking at how He has behaved in the past (Hebrews 13:8). Since He has given advance notice of the precise timing for judgment in the past we should not be surprised that He is revealing the timing of the end today."
Where did God say May 21st, 2011 is the day the rapture will happen? Because I haven't seen that anywhere.

Also according to this website, Jesus is returning on May 21st, and "God will destroy this world on October 21, 2011." Awesome. I'm glad I was warned.

Wait a second! I'm going to the PostSecret event on May 21st (yeah, I'm pumped)! If the rapture happens that day, I'll be devastated if I miss PostSecret. Maybe Jesus and his Daddy can figure out another day to do this whole crazy thing.

The Voice: The Singers Duke it Out, Vocally - Part 1

It's time again for that show I'm not a huge fan of. The Voice. Why is their symbol a peace sign? Lame. (Just so it's clear, I actually get it.)

So it's the battle round, and Christina Aguliera makes it sound like if they don't win, they'll die! Intense. I'd also like to add that I'm pretty sure Christina got a boob job for this show. No one her size has boobs that big. Seriously.

I mean, come on...

First pairing is Frenchie Davis and Tarralyn something-or-other (oh, and there's tension, gotta love drama) and they're gonna sing "Single Ladies." When Christina was singing with them, she messed up the words and said she doesn't care about singing the words right. Duh! When she sang the National Anthem at the Super Bowl, she totally messed up the words. Lame.
Oh, and does anyone recognize Frenchie from American Idol (or some little thing called Broadway)? Apparently she was disqualified because she took topless pictures before the show. Here's Frenchie.

(She's a pretty big girl...)
So, Tarralyn Ramsey sounded terrible. Seriously. It's like she went to the Jacob "I Gyrate for Jesus" Lusk School of Singing. Frenchie did okay.
After much struggle and cluelessness from Christina and Australian lady, the Winner: Frenchie.
Haha! This is great. Tarralyn and her terrible wig are out. Of course Frenchie would make it, it's because American Idol spots talent first.

From Blake Shelton's team:
Patrick Thomas vs. Tyler Robinson. "Burning Love" by Elvis, and Tyler thinks Patrick is cute. He also wants to make people love him, and guess what? I already do (if someone is gay, I will immediately love them; and if they struggled with being gay and Mormon, double plus). Let's take a look at my dear little Tyler.

Seriously, look at him. If he goes home, I'll be very upset. I mean, Tyler is wearing big, nerdy glasses with a suit and bowtie. I'm rooting for my gay Mormon! I'm trying to find a Paul McDonald-like contestant (as in compared to my fandom, but maybe to a lesser degree) on The Voice, but it may not ever happen again.
Patrick sounds like he's trying way too hard to sound country and distinctive - be yourself (and his vest is horrid)! Tyler is so soulful. Guess what they made him? "I'm flaming." Shame on you, The Voice. I really like Tyler, and his attempts to show up Patrick (which he did, in my opinion).
Alright, intense deliberation time between Blake and Reba. They better choose Tyler, my darling gay Mormon! Cee Lo agrees with me, rock on, and so does Adam Levine.
Winner: Patrick.
What the hell Blake?! Why didn't you choose Tyler? Bad choice, my friend. Because you have lost a fan (one which you never even really had in the first place), hopefully this makes you understand your decision was wrong. Sheesh.

Sorry, America, I've had enough heartbreak for one night (actually, it's just time for Stephen Colbert). I'll recooperate from this sudden lost, and post the rest tomorrow night.

Favourite Names of the Week: Royal Wedding Edition

See what I did in the title? Clever.
Is the Royal Wedding still considered a fresh topic? Because I'm dying to cover the lovely names that were on the people of the wedding party. Let's begin!

So I'll use this picture as a guide, and we'll gush over their awesome names. These young junior bridesmaids and toy soldiers (that's what they are, right?) have names suited for royalty, naturally.

Young girl in the back (poor thing, that's the worst picture ever):
Louise Alice Elizabeth Mary
How fancy! She is the granddaughter of Queen Mum Elizabeth (see how British I seemed there?), the daughter of the Earl Edward of Essex.
And she has a younger brother named James Alexander Philip Theo. Awesome, I know.

The little girl in the front, on the far left:
Grace
Sorry, fellow name fanatics, I unfortunately couldn't find her full name. But apparently she is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Hugh van Cutsem (yes, them), and godchild of Prince William. That's all I got. So here's a picture of how miserable she was at the wedding.

Poor girl, she just wants the noise and torture to end. No child under 5 should be in a wedding, or else they could end up like Little Grace - or worse.

Now onto the little girl sitting in front of Prince William. She's my favorite, for a few reasons.
Eliza
Damn! Again, I couldn't get any information of her middle names (this makes me mad). She's pretty much the cutest little girl ever, and here she is with a pink worm toy.

Haha Grace looks miserable, again.

Last little girl in the picture, on the far right.
Margarita Elizabeth Rose Alleyne
Such a beautiful name! Although I have no clue how to pronounce her last middle name. She also has a brother named Charles Patrick Inigo (do you think he was pissed he didn't get to be in the wedding? Probably not...). So this little cutie is the granddaughter of Queen Elizabeth's late sister, Princess Margaret.
Tangent: I love that Queen Elizabeth has corgis (they're my favorite dogs ever), and in the "King's Speech" (excellent movie, go see it) they show a young Elizabeth and Margaret with two corgis. Adorable.

Onto the Toy Soldiers.
The little blond one:
Thomas "Tom"
The other one:
William "Billy"
That's all the dirt I have on them. Unfortunately they haven't been in too many scandals.

Now onto the Maid of Honor and Best Man. Drumroll...

Philippa Charlotte "Pippa"
Okay, I'll just say what everyone else is thinking...her name is fabulous. Just wonderful. While I'm not the biggest fan of Philippa, Pippa has quickly become one of my favorite names (yes, because of the lovely Middleton sister). And, to make it even better, Philippa (and Pippa) means "lover of horses." Come on. That is brilliant. I love Pippa Middleton, and her beautiful name. Let's look at this lovely lady.
Whoa! I just learned racy pictures of Ms. Middleton has surfaced, but I have more integrity than that to post them (well, not really, but I don't see it as a huge problem. She's not the princess).

So elegant! The next one is my favorite.

Quite beautiful.

Next up is the "wild child," Prince William's younger, more attractive brother (sorry, Sir).
Henry Charles Albert David "Harry"
His name is so quintessentially British, I love it. Let's break it down. Henry is a very popular name in Britain, as is Harry, and a very royal choice, indeed. Charles is most likely after his father, Prince Charles. Albert is probably after his great-grandfather, and mother of Queen Elizabeth, King George VI (whose full name was Albert Frederick Arthur George, he was called "Bertie"). David, I'm not really sure, but it may have come from Princess Diana's side. Either way, this name is chockful of royal history.
Let's take a gander at this handsome Prince Harry.

Yeah. Soak it in. That wonderful, adult-sized toy soldier outfit works well for him.

Whoa. So cute. Prince Harry, if Paul McDonald and I don't work out, you're my backup.

So that's all, folks! Royalty and royal names are great. There may or may not be another royal post coming soon.