Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Voice: The Final Showdown

Hello, America! It's time for The Voice: The Final Showdown.
The top 4 contestants will compete for the ultimate prize...winning the show! And a recording contract and other stuff, I think... Let's do this!!

So the show opens with the judges singing "Under Pressure." They tried to make it sound all touching and stuff, but it souds so cheesy. And to top it off, CeeLo is wearing a red bathrobe (at least I'm assuming that's what it is). This song makes me think that the producers were just trying to fill time. Bad way to fill the time, producers.

Here's the low down for tonight: First, they'll sing an original song. This part makes me super excited. American Idol needed this, and this shows true artistry (and I can't wait to see what Dia Frampton does). Then, the contestants will sing a duet with their coaches/judges (which is weird).

Javier Colon
I have a hat for everyday of the week.
Adam fell in love with Javier. He clearly didn't learn the lesson about never falling for a married man (tsk, tsk).
Presenting his original song (but I don't think he wrote it): "Stitch By Stitch" about being a family man. Awesome.
Tonight Javier ditched his baseball cap for a leather hat that matches his jacket. Here's my thoughts: Javier had a decent voice, but it doesn't have the "wow" factor. He also keeps screwing up on some of the notes, and it doesn't sound great. Not to mention that the lyrics to this song are terrible (and cheesy). Seems like Javier is ready to sell out to the pop genre. Congratulations, dude. You'll be a successful sell out.
Now it's time to hear the overly enthusiastic judges gush over Javier's "family man" song. So Blake made no comment about his performance, Christina loved it, CeeLo talked nonsense but loved it. Adam got all choked up to try and garner some votes for Javier (what's in it for him, anyway?).
Overall Grade: B-

Dia Frampton feat. Blake Shelton
"I Won't Back Down" is the duet they'll be singing together. I'm sure Dia will rock it out! I want to make a wager: I wager $1 million that she'll win. (And if I'm wrong, then I'm deleting the previous sentence tomorrow.)
I have to admit...I love the sunglasses and suits thing. They kind of look like the Men in Black. Dia's voice sounds awesome, and her voice works well with Blake's. There's not much else to say about this performance, except that it's AWESOME. Boom. Oh, actually there is something else to say (sorry that I lied): I love their guitars, they're camo! Rock 'n roll.
Overall Grade: A-

Vicci Martinez
So, once again, the original song isn't really original - someone else wrote it. That angers me! Write your own damn songs! But whatever, we'll see what Vicci can do.
This (not really) original song is called "Afraid to Sleep." That's exactly how I feel. Insomniacs, unite!
This immediately shot down a ton of points because of the pre-recorded echoing of her voice in at the end of lines. How cheesy! And, to add to the cheesiness, everyone in the audience was given a glow stick to wave in the air (lame). The lyrics to this song suck, I hate pop music more than I can accurately describe. My thoughts: with Vicci, it's a hit or a miss on hitting notes. Sometimes she sounds great, but others it sounds terrible. I think she gets a bit too excited. The lyrics of the song killed it for me.
Let's hear the judges sugar coat their opinions. Tell it like it is, guys! Sheesh. Adam called her "a powerful little thing," and gave her his pants (weird, because either he wears girl's pants or she wears guy's pants). Blake and Christina blah blah blah-ed it up. And CeeLo sparkled in his bedazzled bathrobe and tried to sound philosophical.
Overall Grade: C

I am skipping through the crap-tacular (this is copyrighted by me, but I'll let you use it) Pitbull and Nee-Yo. I like listening to talented singers - which is why I can't wait to stop watching The Voice.

Beverly McClellan feat. Christina Aguliera
Guess what song Christina chose? "Beautiful." Gosh, she sure has a huge head, by choosing her own song and gushing about how awesome it is. I'm just glad that Beverly is singing it, as well because she is unique and talented.
Beverly starts it off sounding awesome, and then...Christina steps in, and tries to overshadow the contestant (but this isn't shocking). I think it's awesome that Beverly got to sing this, because you can feel the emotion behind the words for her. Her voice sounds great, very strong performance for Beverly (Christina, on the other hand, should probably sing different songs). I dug it! If Dia doesn't win, Beverly should. Actually, Beverly should win but I think Dia will win.
Overall Grade: A

Dia Frampton
She may be shy, but mess with her, and that coffee will be thrown in your face.
I'm really mad because Dia didn't get to choose her own original song! That must make her frustrated, because she's spent years writing her own lyrics. Dia is an artist, and she should be able to use her own music.
Here is "original" song "Inventing Shadows."
Dia took to the piano to sing this new song (when she should be singing her own song). Her voice is so unique and she shows so much emotion, and I love that about her. Unfortunately, the lyrics aren't the great so she probably isn't feeling as emotionally connected to this song. Also, the guys who are dancing behind the screens to seem shadows is super cheesy (my mom pointed out tht strippers usually do that).
Christina didn't even compliment Dia, but instead talked about herself (that's the point of being a judge). CeeLo said her song will be number 1 on iTunes, I sure hope so. Adam pointed out that the theatrics were stupid (agreed!). Blake pointed out that Dia is awesome.
Overall Grade: A- I'm still just angry that she didn't get to write her own song.

Javier Colon feat. Adam Levine
They'll be talking "Man in the Mirror" for their duet. How magical!
Javier removed his hat again! He looks old again, but better. Yeah, that might be a contradiction, but oh well. I'm not taking this performance seriously (sorry, guys). I think Adam should have chosen his own song, "Moves Like Jagger." Because, really, that song inspires me. Seriously though, their voices sound pretty good together. They're both high pitched, pop enhanced voices.
Overall Grade: B-

So, I skipped through Brad Paisley (sorry, bud). But I did see him pull Blake Shelton up onstage. Comradery at its finest.

Beverly McClellan
I hope there's a bagpipe in this song! If there is anything resembling pop music in this song, I'm giving up (on what? I'm glad you asked. This terrible show, is what).
This song has tons of crescendo, and it's called "Love Sick." Here we go again...
There's too much drum in this song, it's kind of poppy and rock-ish. I was hoping for some bagpipes or Beverly playing the piano, but it looks like I've been let down. Here's the thing...I'm not a fan of this song. It feels like the opposite of Beverly's style, and the horrible lyrics don't help (seriously, whoever they hired to write these songs should be fired or executed immediately). Beverly's short time at the piano was the highlight of the song...that's when her voice sounded the best, too. I'm more disappointed with the song than Beverly's voice.
CeeLo is like a philosopher, in a blinding bathrobe. Adam sat there and looked hot (I barely listen when he talks, he's just eye candy for me). Blake said, "If music were crack, you would have a serious problem." Story of my life... Christina gushed and gushed and blah blah blah.
Overall Grade: B for Beverly

Vicci Martinez feat. CeeLo Green
For this "explosive" duet, they'll be singing "Love is a Battlefield." I'm not completely sure what CeeLo said most of the time, but I did hear him say something about "whipper snappers."
So, according to Vicci and CeeLo, this will be epic (it sure seems that way). A rock version of a classic ballad, I can't wait.
CeeLo comes out looking like a character from World of Warcraft with young children bowing to him (that worries me). These over-the-top theatrics are ridiculous and super distracting. Also, my mom said, "CeeLo really is a freak." True that. I really liked the idea of making this into a rock song, but I much preferred watching this with my eyes closed (see what I did there?).
Overall Grade: D+ The ridiculous theatrics and CeeLo's semblance to a demon earned this performance a low grade.

Okay guys, vote smartly (Dia, Beverly, Dia, Beverly). The fate of these singers is in your hands. Don't screw this up like you did with American Idol!
And with that, good night (vote for Dia).

1 comment:

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