Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Voice: The Battles, Part 3

So I'll start this recap with a quick review of last week (sorry I missed it, it was my darling mother's birthday). Here we go.
Blake's Team: Jared Blake
Christina's Team: Beverly McClellan (So far, this team has two bald-headed women. I'm really observant.)
Cee Lo's Team: Nakia
Adam's Team: Javier Coon

These newbies are joining teammates Patrick Thomas, Frenchie Davis, Vicci Martinez, and Casey Weston, respectively. Let's see who else makes it! Woo hoo.

Christina's Team
The battlers: Raquel Castro vs. Julia Eason. This is sure to be a good one (I can only assume). They'll be singing "Only Girl (In the World)" by Rihanna. Awesome.
So Christina loves these young dynamos. She seems super excited about both of these powerhouses (I'm really just using the words that the show uses, I find them absurdly descriptive).
I should add that Raquel is already a star (kind of). She was in Jersey Girl with Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck. You don't need this terrible show!
But she really wants Christina's awesome advice for singing. I have advice for them - please stop singing. Both of these girls are so average, and neither of their voices sound very great to me. They're kind of pitchy (to borrow from my dawg, Randy).
Onto the showdown!
Raquel sounds kind of off at the beginning of the sound, so does Julia. They're both trying way too hard to sound original. Especially Raquel, she's putting some weird kind of strain on her voice that sounds so forced. Julia is trying to hit all these weird notes, and it doesn't really work for her. I hate this. Why am I watching this show?
My predicition is Raquel, because she's cuter than Julia, and Christina probably wants a cute girl for her team (no offense to Frenchie or Beverly).
After some really intense deliberation, it has been decided...
The Winner: Raquel Castro
Yes I was right. I couldn't be more proud. Here she is!

Blake's Team
It's gonna be Dia Frampton vs. SeraBee (this is the funniest name in this whole competition, I bet her parents were major hippies. Oh, her dad was a preacher, so never mind). "Can't Hurry Love" by The Supremes is the song they will sing.
Reba is helping Blake with this tough job of helping out the contestants. According to him, Reba is one of the biggest stars in the world (really? She is?), so naturally she would be on The Voice.
So these two women are complete opposites! Craziness. Hence, they must compete. I kind of like Dia, her audition was decent, and she's a songwriter, which is a major plus for me. SeraBee is going to be annoying, I can promise you that (vocally and personality-wise). SeraBee might have a difficult time with this, since she's used to singing to full people with the Holy Ghost. Awesome. Dia is rather soft when singing, so she probably won't be able to stand up to SeraBee's overpowering vocals.
Let's compete.
Someone scrubbed off SeraBee's tan for this duel (this was actually a good decision). Dia did awesome in the beginning. I actually rather enjoyed her singing, she's unique without being forced. SeraBee is being way too annoying. Her random voice changes remind me of Jacob Lusk, and I'm beyond annoyed with her singing. She's trying way too hard to upstage Dia, and by doing so, she only made Dia seem much more talented. This was a really bad pairing. Just crazy (not in a good way).
My pick is Dia, she was actually very good.
I think the other judges agree with me (other than Adam). Cee Lo thought it was bizarre, and so did I. Weirdest pairing ever.
The Winner: Dia Frampton
I'm two for two today! This is excellent. Here's our timid singer/songwriter.

Adam's Team
The Singing Warriors (I'm digging this term, I may continue using it): Rebecca Loebe vs. Devin Barley (boo, I hated him. His voice is annoying). They'll be singing "Creep" by Radiohead. Guess what? I know this song...from the video game Rockband.
Adam and Adam are going to be aiding these blossoming stars. Devin needs extra help because he doesn't know this song (maybe he should have played Rockband). If they want to help him out, they should tell him to change his tone. It's so awkward and pitchy. Not a fan. Rebecca seems excited about singing this song, and I can dig that. Also, she's a folk singer, and I really love that right now due to my obsession with Mumford & Sons. Adam seems excited about them singing this, but judging by their practice, I'm not on the same page.
The Battle of the Singing Warriors.
Please don't ruin this song for me... Ugh. Devin sounds terrible! He is so pitchy, especially at the end of words. He cannot hold a note for the life of him. Rebecca sounds pretty good, I'm not a huge fan of her's. I think Adam should've picked a Mumford song (Rebecca could've done well with that). Oh lordy, Devin seriously sounds terrible throughout most of this song. If he wins this, I'll be shocked. His tone is very bizarre and verging on whiny.
As I'm sure you can tell, I think Rebecca should win this one.
Blake tells Adam to never separate them (I disagree). Christina loved Devin, especially for his choruses. We must have been watching two different performances, because he only sounded good when Rebecca was singing, and even then... Cee Lo mumbled some nonsense about cohesiveness (seriously, can anyone understand a word he says?).
Adam Levine is so torn! It must be so hard to do his job.
The Winner: Devin Barley
Really? That really just happened? Bad choice, Adam. And now I'm two for three. Here he is.

Cee Lo's Team
Our Singing Warriors: Tori & Taylor Thompson vs. Kelsey Rey. (Are the sisters a package deal or something? Buy one, get one free.) They will be tackling "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield. Good luck, girls.
So the sisters are pig farmers and Kelsey is an internet sensation. I don't even know what to say...
Oh lord, the Thompsons Girls totally screwed up during the practice. I'm going to assume they're just lucky enough to have decent voices, but aren't really talented. Kelsey, on the other hand, seems more talented than Tori and Taylor. Also, rehearsal sounded pretty bad, or at least the part they showed. They don't harmonize very well.
Alrighty, into battle (I'm so glad Tori and Taylor prayed before performing, that's obviously necessary).
Kelsey wins. Yes, I decided that from the first lyric. She's already better than the sisters. Yep, Tori or Taylor (I don't know who is who) just affirmed that when they sang. They sound really bad, almost like they're talking. Like Devin, they can't hold notes and have a rather pitchy tone. Kelsey sounds pretty darn good, though. She has a better tone and understands how this song goes. When all three of them sang the "oh, oh" part, it was bad. Really bad.
Okay, so Kelsey wins this one, duh.
Adam thinks this was too cute. I'm not sure if that's good or not. Blake agrees with me, while Christina would choose the pig farmers.
The Winners: Tori & Taylor Thompson
Wait...seriously? He chose the pig farmers turned aspiring singers over the actually talented singer? Well, alrighty then. Here are the newest additions to Cee Lo's team.

Awesome. I still don't understand how the coach/judge thing will work in the live shows, but I'll just wait and see.
That's it! Tune in tonight to see who wins American Idol. Scotty da Body or Lauren and her sister/mom. Coming soon, to this blog.

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